ferment

So yeah. It was a surreal weekend. I felt more violated this weekend than I have ever been during college by my roommates. Being attacked by men left and right. Happy Pride Day???

Also hearing stories about Leigh-Ugh and her deviant behavior. Naughty filthy girl hehe. Ugh, what is wrong with Clare's friends?! Making out with each other. Making out with me. Blegh! I haven't made out in forever, I'm so rusty- I really didn't know what was going on half the time. I'm trying to do my thing, and the other person was trying to do their thing, so I end up giving up. I don't even know if I enjoyed any of it. The other persons also like shoving their tongues down my throat! EEE! Everybody's so aggressive! Calm it down, jeez! Saliva all over my mouth!

Then there's the complete strangers- touching me and licking my abs/nipple/body, trying to stick their hands down my pants, grabbing my ass as they walk by. Ugh! Gays are just the same as straights: terrible!

Anyhow, excluding all the events that involved people molesting my body, it was a fun time. If I could do it again, I probably wouldn't bring my jacket next time. It wasn't that cold with that many bodies on the street. Oh yeah, and no raw sexual contact of any kind next time either!

I feel so dirty! And yet I went again today!

We also ended up eating at this sushi place along Castro. Halfway during the meal, I started having deja vu about the place. Poor quality food, Cantonese speaking employees at a Japanese establishment, and the bathroom with the black tiles. And then it hit me- this was the place Drab took me to earlier in the school year. UGH! Why was I there again?!

Random thought- me agreeing to iChat with Janey, but before I accept her invitation, I would drop my pants so that my ass cheeks would be staring/greeting her in the face.

Dreamed about Kaiser. She and I were having a personal conversation, and she was telling me that she found a boyfriend. Not sure whether I was crushed or angry in the dream.

So today- I agreed to go see Hesse and Drab at the Dykes and Bikes parade. Woke up late, showered, took the train to Powell. At first I left the station on the wrong side of the street, so I went back down, following Hesse's directions, and saw the Old Navy store. Once I saw the store, I looked directly to the left of it towards the street to find said people. Who do I notice instantly from glancing at the crowd? DRAB. Drab and his blonde head, ugh. I decided to go back down into the station to get to the other side of the street and grab lunch. Only, the usually shitty Carl's Jr. that's filled with homeless, low income people were now filled with tourists and gays of the world.

So instead I decided to head up to Chinatown and grab cheap dim sum. OHHHH it wss so cheap! I ended up trying You's Dim Sum, which was listed on Yelp. 10+ items for $5.90! YES! The shrimp dumplings and pork siu mai were probably the best things that I had there, mainly because dim sum batches are made early, and the products dry by that late of a lunchtime. So I may try getting there earlier next weekend to try their products as well as the other stalls with such low prices. There's also the Clement area dim sum...

Walked back down Stockton, walked over to Powell and went into H&M, browsed for a while, got back to Old Navy to see that the parade was mostly over. Then this supposed stranger jumped on me, putting his arm around my neck. Turned out to be Hesse. Walked with his friends to the booths and concerts, met up with Drab, Clare and his friend. First time I've seen Drab in months, and he greets me by patting my stomach. Weirdo.

Dinnertime. Park Chow. Once again, while I'm reading the menu, or ordering my food, or eating my meal, I kept feeling this rubbing against my leg. Sometimes tapping, sometimes just laying next to my left leg. I look down through the crack between the tables, and what do I find but Drab's legs extended across, crossed, and fidgeting at my leg. Later on during dinner when I couldn't take it anymore, I use my hand to try to push the foot away, and then Drab just kicks it back to place, saying that he was doing that on purpose. Which then leads me to wonder how many of the other previous times were on purpose. HATEFUL!

Played Smash Bros. Brawl and Mario Soccer on Wii for the first time at Drab's house. Glad I don't have a console anymore- my eyes get so dry when I stare at a TV screen for too long, they start glazing over, and my vision gets blurred.

Tired. Blog later. I missed Margaret Cho, Lady Gaga, Ket Deluna, Cyndi Lauper at the Main Stage today!

star spangled

Gay Pride party in the Castro- UGHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! I feel dirty!!!

I hope nobody took pictures. AHHHH!

vulpine

15.

2 days ago?

Dream #1:
I was in class with my current human sexuality teacher, and he was giving premed advice at first, but it slowly transitioned to fashion advice. He told this one student to contact Vera Wang, and gave the business card to him. At the end of class, the students were all supposed to turn in a blue sheet, a white slip, and a manilla envelope full of papers in trays at the front desk. I left my backpack on my desk while walking up to the trays/bins to turn in my homework. This guy at the front asked me to wait for him even though I was going back to my seat. Got to my desk, picked up my backpack, and left. Back at the apartment, this girl was waiting there, someone from class, and she asked if she could borrow one of my things. She proceeded to walk into my room, asked about some stuff, and was criticizing how small the apartment was. Then I started arguing back with her, but she left, and somehow she turned out to be the next door neighbor, leaving some note on the front of my door. I headed for the station, missed the train, and had to wait until the next one... enter second dream.

Dream #2:
Setting- an open top dance floor, or a club with the roof excised. Drab asked to dance with me, which puzzled me since he can't dance. Not only that, I was still mad at him, but SOMEHOW I ended up agreeing, so long as we didn't talk. We were dancing cheek to cheek, Drab and me, like that Fred Astaire song, only in my song, it would begin with "Hell... I'm in Hellllllll..." (http://youtube.com/watch?v=pJ4a7kpUG2E). What was peculiar, besides the blatantly obvious, was that we danced in 3-second intervals, paused, and resumed, repeating that pattern over and over. After the beginning, there certainly was no talking afterwards, so Drab could at least follow instructions. Towards the end, I had this out of body experience as the view panned out, with me overlooking the entire scene, seeing the both of us on the dance floor. I was literally suspended in disbelief, so embarrassed that I pulled myself out of my sleep.

Turns out these two dreams occurred within the span of 1-2 hours. Is it possible to enter REM sleep in that short of a time? I don't know what pisses me off more, the dream itself, or the fact that my subconscious automatically resolves my conflict for me so that I can't hold a grudge against that asshole in reality. From a rational standpoint, asking me to dance was a much safer choice than asking me out to dinner- that probably would have been more irksome. UGH I'm so angry; going to eat something.

Might go see Wall-E tomorrow morning. Then... observing the gay holidays?