So maybe I lied.

I don't think I like people that much. I find myself getting angry at people, but not doing anything about it. Last night I went to bed being mad. Not sure why. I didn't stay up though. People cry themselves to sleep, pop pills to go to sleep, or get tired out.

Being knowledgable: if all your friends read the newspaper, what point is there in reading it if they're just going to rehash it back to you? Conversations: spreading information. Is it vital information though? Why should I care about everyone else's problems?

I think I'm going to go to lab tomorrow. It's not one of the places where I can find quiet, but it's soothing. Maybe I am better off interacting with lab animals and chemicals than people?

Poor Crassie. Getting sad over the fact that not many graduates are going to stay in Texas afterwards. I need to move on, get out of this place.

Maybe that's why I don't like interacting with people- it's another chance for me to efface them from my life, just like I did to my high school friends. They say your college friends will be different from your high school friends, but it's still the same pattern. Everybody goes elsewhere, only caring about their own issues/concerns, and eventually drift apart.

I don't even remember being invited to any of my good friends' weddings from high school, knowing that they got married after the fact.

I feel like sandwiches, pickles, and chips tonight. I think I've hit a dead end in Chinese cooking. Either I need to move to California and pick up things from my grandmother, or find some other hobby.

Compulsion- latex free examination gloves. I waste several of those in lab. Maybe because I'm paranoid about getting neurotoxin on my skin, retard my sperm. But I seriously don't care about progeny at this point in the game.

Board games- maybe I'll bring a couple/all of them back with me when I go home during spring break.

Blogger- seems more convenient to use than xanga since it's connected to my gmail and homepage. I don't know.

HAHA, someone's cell phone just went off in one of the rooms at the LRC. THRILLER~! michael jackson.

Phil Collins in Genesis- AH!

Crap. Kai's birthday's coming up soon. The problem with gift-giving: having to think about that person and everything you've talked about, their interests, blahhhhh. It's so tiring. Sorting through memories that you think wouldn't take priority over things like distinguishing nicotinic and muscarinic receptors, but apparently there's still room for them. Somehow.

-you know I want to, but I'm in too deep-